Just Us Girls

Just Us Girls

...one SMC's adventures in single motherhood.

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

It's really true.

Once you have a kid, your perspective on dating and relationships changes drastically. For better or for worse, I think perhaps I've become more discriminating...because now there's someone else's welfare to safeguard. I would daresay that I've always been very independent and resistant to depending on anyone, which is especially tough now as a mother because there are (and will be many more) times that I have to depend on someone else's help. But in terms of dating and relationships? Fuhgeddaboudit. I feel like it's almost like, one strike and you're out. Which is exactly how I feel right now.

He's not who I thought he was.

How disappointing. But life goes on.


  1. That's a bummer...but better to find out sooner than later. Sorry it didn't work out.

  2. I am glad you posted that. A lot of women do not take there children in to account just not to be alone. I see it all the time and I feel so bad for the children!!!

  3. It's disappointing that this relationship didn't turn out to be what you thought. But it's no surpise that you have become more discriminating. Yes, you must think about your daughter, of course, but it goes deeper than that. You've found a way to create the life you've always wanted. You now know that you don't need to compromise or turn a blind eye to troubling characteristics in others.
    Becoming a mom makes some things more difficult but it also makes some things much, much clearer and easy to decide.

  4. Oh dear. That's sad to hear. BUT - think of it this way, having this new 'perspective' has just saved you two or three, maybe even more dates with this guy who in the end wouldn't be right for you anyway.

    I was single with two children for a very long time (5 years) and my kids were 4 and 2 when I became single. Not only did I not have a lot of time to date, but if I were going on a date, and I was not only spending time away from my kids, but also spending money on a sitter, that date BETTER be worth it.

    Otherwise, a good book on the couch would have been a way better choice for my night.

    There will be someone who will knock your socks off and love both of
    you like crazy. And the best part, he's probably just around the corner.

    Just stick to your guns and go with this 'new perspective'. Consider it a gift :)


  5. Sorry it didn't work out. A great guy will come along one day. I have found that having a child made me realize I have no time or patience for the losers I might have normally dated.

  6. I'm really sorry it didn't work out, Heather. But since you're weeding them out faster, it means your Mr. Right can get here sooner!