Just Us Girls

Just Us Girls

...one SMC's adventures in single motherhood.

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

This and that

Just a quick update...

  • Glasses for K still haven't come in yet. I just want to get on with it already, get her started getting used to them over the weekend and send them to daycare with her sometime next week. Thank you, everyone, for your comments and stories...I'm much more at peace with the whole thing now than I was last week. Everything will ALL work out.
  • Serious Weight Loss Plan starts on Friday. Only because it's April first, and I want to make great progress by the end of May at the very least. They always say you have a much better chance of achieving a goal by going public with it, so here it is. Wish me luck, I'm gonna need it. I did lose 40 lbs before I got pregnant, so I know I can do it. It's all a matter of committing to it "officially" NOW. No more chocolate, Heather.
  • Eight more weeks of school before summer break. And yes, I'm counting down. Seventh graders SUCK in the springtime, just in case you were wondering. The upside is the fact that I'm in the midst of planning an awesome and rejuvenating unit on incorporating art, photography, and writing (specifically poetry in response to art) that will get us through the end of the year. It'll culminate in a gallery-type of celebration for students and parents that will coincide with the spring choir, band and orchestra concert in May...can't wait.
  • Our school talent show is on April 29th, so things are going to be busy this month as I get everything lined up for that.
  • K turns 13 months on Saturday!! Woo hoo! This morning was a tad rough only because it was the very first time that K cried as though her heart would break when she realized I was dropping her off at daycare and actually LEAVING her there. She loves it there, but it's that separation anxiety thing in full force. She was so sad this morning as I left...yes, I did shed a few tears in the car on the way to school. But it's all part of her growing up, I know. The trade-off is how ecstatic she was to see me when I picked her up again this afternoon. I think we were equally happy to see one another after a long day.
  • SO glad warmer weather is on its way...eventually. I have big plans for my backyard, even though it's pretty much the size of a postage stamp...grass seed needs to be sown, and I can't wait to plant flower and vegetable gardens back there. I have a wonderful vision of K and me hanging out back there together this spring and summer, enjoying the flowers and the great weather. Spring weather always puts me in a good mood!

Thursday, March 24, 2011



I can't believe it. I've been processing this turn of events since Tuesday. Her little glasses haven't come in yet, but I know I'll feel better about it once they arrive (hopefully tomorrow). She's *very* farsighted, and her prescription is a strong one. Our next appointment with Dr. Lee is at the beginning of June, when he'll reevaluate the state of her vision and decide what's next, or perhaps tweak her prescription. The next step might be patching (to be worn with the glasses) and potentially surgery down the road. But Dr. Lee did say that he'd be very surprised if she actually ends up needing the surgery.

So what's on my mind, exactly?
  • Does this make my baby "special needs", since babies with glasses are relatively rare?
  • The unbelievable cost. I spent $500 on her glasses on Tuesday, and I'm afraid to even ponder how quickly she'll grow out of them. She's only 12 1/2 months old, and she's growing fast. I can't add her to my vision plan until November, so I'm stuck with these kinds of expenses until then.
  • Will insensitive strangers make comments or even worse, make fun of her? How will I handle stupid questions??
  • Buyer's remorse. I REALLY wish I had shopped around more before I placed the order for her glasses. I received horrible customer service at the children's eyeglass place that's located right inside the Children's Eye Center, especially as a first-time buyer of glasses for a baby. I should've just walked away and gone somewhere else. But I do like the frames I did order...sweet pale pink with an elastic band that goes around the back of her head. I just hope they fit...what if they're not the right size? I mean, are these things returnable?!
  • So many options for frames for babies and toddlers...lots of decisions down the line as she grows and I have to buy new pairs. I can barely pick out frames for myself, which is why I haven't owned a pair of glasses in over ten years. (I wear contacts.)
  • I really should order a pair of glasses for myself in the near future, which seems to be the general consensus of many other parents of babies in glasses...they say it helps when Mom wears 'em, too.
  • Will the extra costs of keeping K in glasses be too prohibitive for trying again for baby #2? Which brings me to...why on earth can't I just be happy with the idea of only one child?? I can't really fathom spending a grand on each attempt that MIGHT NOT WORK now that I know how much a thousand bucks means for K and me. That's more than a month of daycare costs. And can I even risk waiting another year and trying again when I'm almost 43?
Okay, so you can see from the last unrelated bullet that I have more on my mind than just the glasses issue, but it all seems to lead into something else. Oh, and I also started a list of resources for parents of babies with glasses...just for me, but maybe it'll help someone else in the same boat, who knows.

Friday, March 11, 2011


And I'm trying not to be, but it's not working. It's like this dark shadow that's constantly in the background of the daily minutiae. We have an appointment on March 22nd with the opthalmologist at a place called The Children's Eye Center. I'm glad we have the appointment (really glad) because I want to be proactive about it...I've noticed that when she focuses on things that are close-up, K's eyes have a pronounced cross to them. And according to her pediatrician, this should be getting less noticeable, not more. I'm noticing it more and more, and there are times when she'll look up at me from whatever she was doing and her eyes stay crossed a little bit instead of lining up correctly. Not every time, but definitely more often.

Truth be told, I'm completely freaked out because I'm afraid this might be forecasting a lot of vision problems to come, and that's the last thing I want for her. I have to keep reminding myself that it's still so early--she's only twelve months old--and there's lots of time for correction, whatever that might entail. According to her main caregiver at daycare, whose grandkids dealt with it, they typically start with a patch and then move on to glasses. I'm fine with both of those options, but it's the unknown that's really freaking me out.

I know I'll feel a lot better once I find out what Dr. Lee has to say. We saw him once back in September about her blocked tear duct, and he mentioned that he thought she was more farsighted than a lot of other babies her age, which certainly fits in terms of the eye crossing. (I'm a bit confused by that, since I'm extremely nearsighted and K's donor didn't need any vision correction, according to his profile. There is no farsightedness in my family at all. But I'm sure it happens as a fluke, too...doesn't need to be inherited.) Apparently what can happen, if it's left untreated, is that the brain stops being able to interpret what the eyes might actually be seeing, and vision can actually be lost...such a scary thought.

I hate the idea of my precious girl having "special needs" in any way at all...I really hope this works out in the best possible scenario. Perhaps I know too much...I see how the kids at the middle school where I teach bully one another, especially kids who are even the slightest bit different, and it truly breaks my heart. Fighting against bullying is an uphill battle on a daily basis, and we do the best we can, but...

Only ten more days to go, and then I will get to rest a little easier. Like I said, it's the not knowing that's so hard.

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

One year ago today...

...my world was turned upside-down, and I couldn't be happier. My sweet Kiernan Sienna came into the world, and she has brought so much joy and love to me and to my family. I am so blessed!!

Here she was on day one...

And here she is at her spunky best on day 365...

I just love her to pieces. I can hardly believe it's been a whole year! So much has happened since those first days, and I am so thankful every day for her. Right now she's pulling up on absolutely everything and cruising around the furniture...not crawling, though, which is something I was looking forward to. I don't think it'll be long before she takes her first steps by herself...she loves walking around from person to person, grasping their fingers for balance. She's found her perfect method of scooting around on her butt, which seems to work for her so she's not interested in figuring out how to crawl. She jabbers away constantly, with "Mama" a frequently-heard word, and so much of her jabbering sounds like actual language. I can't wait for her to start using actual words for different objects! She loves to snuggle, especially right before bed when she snuggles right into my arms and falls asleep. I'm hard-pressed, though, to get up off the couch and bring her up to her bed right away...many evenings I've enjoyed just holding her for an extra hour, sometimes two, as she sleeps. It's quite addictive.

I've just started her on whole milk (often mixed in with her formula) and we're still working on finger foods, which has been slow going because she seems quite picky about textures (she gags) and doesn't seem interested in eating many table foods except Cheerios, teething biscuits, and puffs. She seems slow to accept new foods, but I'm hoping that she will eventually. Her top two teeth have just broken through, so I'm hoping that once it's easier for her to actually chew with her bottom and top teeth together, the table foods will come. We keep trying, though. She's getting really good at drinking from her straw sippy cups, and she also loves drinking from "regular" cups as well.

She loooooves her toys, and has definite favorites, and she also loves exploring and discovering new objects, many of which Mom is NOT happy that she's found. She knows how to keep her mama on her toes! I love the fact that she is enjoying books more and more, and she seems to love playing with the board books she "finds" (that I've left out for her) as well. So much more to say, and not enough hours left in the day. I'm exhausted! (state standardized testing at school this week) So I'm off to bed. Happy birthday, baby girl--I love you so much!