Just Us Girls

Just Us Girls

...one SMC's adventures in single motherhood.

Tuesday, May 18, 2010


My milk supply is dwindling.

I've been pumping since early April, to get ready for my April 16th return to full-time teaching. And there have been days, especially in the last week, when my ridiculous schedule at school has prevented me from pumping at all during the school day. Nursing seems to still be going well...I haven't had to supplement when we're at home together. But I've now burned through my frozen stash, and the bottles I got together for tomorrow (well, later today...) are about half breastmilk and half formula. And I can't believe how sad this is making me.

I won't give up without a fight, I tell myself, which includes: taking Fenugreek twice a day, drinking lactation tea, drinking a lot more water (I'm not good about that), pumping more frequently when I'm at home, and pumping for longer periods of time, even after no more milk is coming out. I don't really know what else I can do, but I am willing to consider prescription medication if these other things don't work. So now I've just been moping around with this constant aching sadness...I don't. want. to. stop. nursing. yet. And neither does K, that's been made perfectly clear to me. I'm not against formula at all...I'm just not ready to quit nursing yet. It's too soon. If I can make it through next Thursday, there's hope...that's the last day of school, and I won't have to rely on pumping for the rest of the summer. I keep thinking of these adoptive moms who are able to re-lactate and nurse their adopted infants...if they can do it, so can I. Damn it.


  1. Oh Heather, I'm sorry to hear...hopefully you'll be able make it until Thursday.

  2. Hope you manage to make it past Thursday!

  3. Hi Heather,

    I've never posted, but I occasionally read the blogs of single moms by choice. I've been considering becoming part of the club. I'm not sure if this will work for you, but thought I'd share a site with you that I've bookmarked. http://www.milkmakers.com/
    I saw it on Oprah. I hope maybe you can make use of the info on there. Good luck!

  4. I'm really sorry to hear this Heather. I cried for a couple of days when I realized that I'd have to supplement with formula and it took me a while to stop pumping all together. I was pretty sad that what I thought would be so easy and natural was really difficult for me. By the time my milk supply increased (with the tea and medication) my baby was so used to the bottle she refused to nurse at all. Feeding her became a battle. And I was devasted.

    At the same time I was super tired. Pumping every three hours to make sure my milk supply didn't die became a ridiculous feet especially when the baby started sleeping 6 - 7 hours at a time. I would still wake up to pump. I was also more tied to home then ever since I didn't drag the pump around with me. A full day out was impossible.

    Although I wish I was still nursing her, I can honestly say feeding her with formula is still a bonding experience for us (more so now since there is no battle) and all that is important is that she is happy and healthy. And she is. Good luck and I hope you make it to Thursday.